Procrastination. Excuses. Making up a billion reasons not to do something. Once you discover for yourself how doing something about your problems can change your life, you start to notice when other people are stuck.
They’ll say something like ‘oh I can’t do that because of X, Y, Z.’ And at that moment you know they’re not ready to make a change or move forward. My life coach Antonio Esposito has taught me an invaluable skill. The ability to take action.
As you may or may not be aware, I suffer with pretty severe anxiety. I’ve always been a worrier. I was a conscientious kid. So historically, when I come across a problem or something I’m worried about, I’ll spend hours, sometimes days and at the worst of times, weeks practically worrying myself sick.
Self-sabotage. It wasn’t until I worked with Antonio that I realised the only person ruining my happiness is me. I sort of knew that I was worrying too much, but I’ve now started to recognise that I’m choosing to make myself suffer.
But, hoorah, I’m making progress.
Soon is not as good as now.
I love this quote. You know when you have to do something, but you can’t be bothered or really don’t want to? Perhaps you’re scared. You’ll tell yourself, ‘I’ll do it later.’ And you’ll keep putting it off. Well, you’ll never get anything done. The key is to start something. Just make a start, that’s all you need to do.
Get the ball rolling and trust me, you will instantly feel a million times better. I obviously have more serious worries and concerns in my life, but usually, it’s the stupid pathetic worries that drag me down. Like knowing I need to get my car serviced, and the more time passes, the more miles go by. All I had to do was bloody book it in and I fretted about it for months.
Losing a set of car keys genuinely made me anxious and miserable for about three whole days. You might be thinking to yourself, these are ridiculous worries – but they’re just bubbling on the surface, coming out instead of the darker concerns I have. And soz guys, but my dark worries are staying locked away for now, because some of them are pretty personal and I can’t share them just now.
I also freaked out about my tax return the other week. And you know how I stopped myself from going into a full blown anxiety fuelled meltdown? I called my accountant. I took action. I researched some things that made a difference.
So, my friends. My point is very simple.
If things aren’t happening for you, do something about it. Work out how you can solve the problem.
Not getting that promotion? What five actions will mean it’s more likely to happen?
Honestly, since changing a few habits and being more proactive with my problems, I feel soooo much better. Slowly but surely I’m able to cope with the things that start to set off my anxiety. First of all, I notice the worry bubbling away in my chest, and the irrational thoughts that run through my mind. Like, you’ll never find your car keys, your tax next year will be extortionate and you won’t get any business next year. Then I shut those thoughts away and think right, how can I solve this problem? What can I do to put my mind at ease?
Another interesting thing I’ve noticed about myself is that annoyingly, worrying can sometimes help me. Why? Because it gets me to get shit done. It’s my motivation, my coping mechanism. If I worry enough, I’ll get to a point where I can’t stand the stress anymore and I’ll try to find a solution. It would be lovely if I’d skip the sickening worry part and skip to the solution part, but that’s not my reality.
I’m giving myself a little pat on the back for making a fair bit of progress lately. I’m getting closer to some of my goals because I’ve fought to move forwards. I’m not saying I’m some superwoman working my way towards world domination (though that would be pretty cool TBF), BUT, I am making small improvements. And for now, it’s a start. Slowly, things are beginning to improve and happen, not because the universe is being kind to me, but because I’m being kind to myself and getting sh*t done. Yay for me!
